Rants & rave reviews by someone who doesn't know any better.
Monday, October 22, 2012
The Dream of the 90's
I've been thinking a lot lately about the dream of the 90's and why it seems to be considered the Camelot years for people in my age group. Maybe it is because we were young so already the world was less jaded and idealism seemed natural. Maybe it was because the economy was strong and Clinton was playing a sax and eating Big Macs. Maybe it was because it was a pre-9/11 world where there seemed less to fear. But for whatever reason, the 90's are being regarded as a great era. And I've noticed a lot of fashion trends from the 90's coming back-printed denim, platform shoes, plaid. I just wish I hadn't thrown away my sweet blue Doc Martins.
Now, during this rough election season, where idealism seems like it can no longer exist, hop aboard my magic time machine and revisit some of my favorite things of from a simpler time that will fill you with nostalgia, make you feel like the grunge-wearing giddy Clintonista you once were, and also probably make you feel old.
Stop! Hammer Time! Parachute pants for everyone!
Go paint your nails a shimmery pastel with Hard Candy nail polish and then sport the plastic matching ring. This way when you say "Talk to the hand" you look pretty too.
Tune into Bill Nye the Science Guy and forget that he is now at the
center of major science and political discussions with his beliefs on
evolution and his push to get money for the space program. Just sit back
and watch in wonder as he dazzles you simply with quirky science.
Go dial up and check your AOL mail and send some flirty instant messages. Who needs twitter, texting, or facebook?
Before we were all looking for Osama Bin Laden, we were all spending obsessive amounts of time looking for this sassy lady in her red trench coat. And remember that awesome Rockapella theme song? Forget those kids on Glee-these guys rocked.
Make a mix tape! Record your favorites off the radio and spend hours with your dual tape deck creating the perfect mix to listen to in the car or on your Walkman. And of course don't discredit this as the perfect gift for that special someone. I still have all the awesome mixtapes made for me. I just wish I had my Boombox to play them on. Sometimes it's just a listen to Meredith Brooks' "Bitch" kind of day.
This is what used to come to mind as a binder. There was only one woman involved. Lisa Frank. Let's keep it that way.
Tune into TV like you mean it. Because there is no DVR or Netflix. Sure you can pop in a spare VHS and record it, but what are you going to talk about tomorrow if you missed what the gang was up to on Seinfeld. It's Must See TV! And there's no shame in being dateless on a Friday night. Luckily TGIF offered you Urkel and Dinosaurs to keep you laughing and part of a perfect wholesome family while you were alone the couch.
This is what a financial investment looks like. Owning these is as good
as a 401K. This could be your education, your first home. Garcia Bear
Beenie Baby has street cred. Get it straight. Enron went belly up
because of Beenie Babies. Seriously they are what backs the American
dollar instead of gold. These had to have been the root of the great
economy. If Beenie Babies come back, so will a better economy. Simple.
This is your power couple. Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake. The Beckhams are a distant thing of the future. Kim and Kanye's matching outfits of today have nothing on these guys in their cool blue denim and denim looks. Their deep love can't possibly be a one hit wonder.
You let everyone know you have a cool and classy pad by having this Big Mouth Billy Bass fish on your wall start singing Take Me to The River. It really gets the party started and your guests marvel at the life like technology.
As the President slams down his Big Mac, you feel no guilt wanting Taco Bell because of these amazing ads. Who cares that an obesity problem is looming, super size me! Bloomberg can't stop me.
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