La Cheeze & Whine Winter Shut In Netflix Binge List

We are bracing for Snowpocolypse 2016 on the east coast. With this year's mild weather so far, I feel we are all actually like this teacher looking forward to some snow for forced couch time.
And since obviously we have all already binged on Making a Murderer and are stressed out from Sarah Palin, I figured I'd let you know about some fun and maybe lesser known picks from the lighter side of Netflix viewing that will help calm you down and get you through.

La Cheeze & Whine Winter Shut In Netflix Binge List

"The Spoils Before Dying"

An IFC mini-series that is a creative parody of vintage bad tv follows a 1950s jazz pianist turned private eye who becomes embroiled in a murder investigation. It's sort of a high budget, extended SNL skit starring Will Ferrell, Kristen Wiig, Chris Parnell, Maya Rudolph. It's so intentionally terrible that is delightful. Make it a true binge and watch its sister series "The Spoils of Babylon" while you are at it.

"Vexed"

A snarky British police sitcom featuring a mis-matched pair of Detectives with sexual tension who must work together to solve bizarre murders. If you like things like "Law and Order: SVU" and "Castle," but wish they had more sarcasm and sex, you'll dig this.

"The Search for General Tso"

A history of the real General and how my favorite Chinese take out chicken dish got named for him. Informative, filled with fodder for interesting anecdotes that you can wow any crowd with when they bring up Chinese food. It's also told like a good detective story, and best watched while enjoying some take out-because you will definitely be craving some watching this.

"Lucky"

After all the recent Lottery craze, this is a relatable one. It's a dark comedy about a serial killer who unwittingly wins the lottery jackpot starring Colin (Tom's son) Hank, Ann-Margaret, and Mimi Rogers aka the gum girl from Nick and Nora's Infinite Playlist.

"The Riches"

You may have missed this totally binge worthy show when it aired on FX nearly a decade ago, but it is so good. Eddie Izzard plays a gypsy con-artist who leads his family into stealing the upscale life of another man who they find dead on his way to moving into his new home. You won't be able to stop until the end. And Izzard creates a character who, like Tony Soprano, makes you so confused about what is actually right and wrong.

"Jem"

Not the shit movie they attempted to make. The original. The 80s cartoon that you probably watched but didn't really understand. It is like a soap opera with date drama plots worthy of Sex and the City. And just as stylish.

"Friends with Benefits"

A short lived but cute sitcom from 2011 that if you like things like "How I Met Your Mother," "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia," and "New Girl" you will enjoy. Right from the first scene of the pilot episode where a guy, rushing out of bed after sleeping with his best friend, puts on her skinny jeans instead of his own.  Oh the struggle.

"The Increasingly Poor Decision of Todd Margaret"

David Cross' dark sided humor creates this character who is destined to fail and bring everyone around down with him in this IFC sitcom about a pathetic loser who accidentally gets sent by his company to work in London, despite the fact that he is so clueless he doesn't even know that the Pound and Dollar have different values. Also stars my favorite British actress/comedian/writer Sharon Horgan.

"Better Off Ted"

A brilliant sitcom about a heartless company called Veridian and the employees who "don't fight it." Starring the super cute Jay Harrington and Portia de Rossi being the ultimate perfect corporate bitch. This show is so clever it is hard to believe it only was allowed to exist for two years. It is vainglorious. So watch it. For Jenkins. You'll get all this when you watch it.

"Small Town Security"

A reality show about a family security business in a small town in Georgia led by the matriarch Joan, a former local cable access tv star whose employees include a trans-gender security guard who is in a bizarre love triangle with her. There are all the elements you need here for captivating viewing of bizarre realities of other lives. So get on it.

"Bojack Horseman"

An animated series in the twisted vein of "Archer," this one is about a horse who was a 90s sitcom star but is now a miserable drunk desperate for a comeback. Hilarious and raunchy and filled with great pull quotes. 

There you have it! Now get binging!

The Holiday of Making A Murderer

Happy 2016! I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday season. I did. Thanks to Netflix. Netflix gave me exactly what I wanted this holiday season. A show so worthy of binging that I forgot all about the three trillion questions my nosey relatives asked me about how my "acting" career is going and if I have found "somebody" yet. A show so deliciously captivating that I forgot all about the high calorie holiday cookie bender I'd gone on. A show that turned my post Christmas cold that had me curled up on the couch shut off from society and massacring tissues into the most wonderful time.

I am of course talking about "Making a Murderer." The Netflix original documentary series that they launched just in time for the holidays, knowing that everyone would be desperately searching for something to do beside stand in line to return their gifts or visit more with their strange cousins. 

And unless you have been living trapped underneath your Christmas tree due to a freak decorating accident, you too probably got sucked into this 10 hour television trap. 

Watching the whole 10 hours. At once.

Despite the several times in the 10 hours when Netflix stupidly questioned my life choices by interrupting the next episode from starting saying "Are you sure you're still watching?" Are you mocking me Netflix? Stop passing judgement and just get back to showing me that fat pawn of a prosecutor with the mustache. 

The whole 10 hours got me more and more filled with rage and shock at the seemingly evil police state we live in. My rage levels became out of control high while watching this. Like Nicholas Cage rage.

I had to consume a box of wine to calm myself.

Making a Murderer follows the story of Steven Avery and his intellectually challenged minor nephew who are accused of rape and murder shortly after Steven Avery was released from jail where he spent 18 years for a crime that DNA cleared him from. Avery was also in the midst of a multi-million dollar lawsuit against the county for this error when bam-he's back in cuffs. With crazy evidence popping up everywhere. It was a true crime story 10 years in the making by Columbia film grads Laura Ricciardi and Moira Demos. And each twist and turn left me with so many questions to fuel the fire burning inside me. I had flames....flames on the side of my face. ....

Why are these County policemen who clearly have motive allowed anywhere near this case and evidence? Why was Avery's poor mentally challenged nephew questioned without help and then led into believing that if he told them what they wanted to hear that he could get home in time to watch Wrestlemania? If Avery did kill this girl and try to hide it, why didn't he crush her car, that was literally in the lot next to a car crusher? What is wrong with this jury? Why?

I have watched endless hours of Law and Order:SVU, so I feel that makes me pretty versed in criminal affairs, the law, and spotting liars. And this show raises tons of red flags and makes you lose faith in the American justice system. Where is Benson, Stabler, and that husky voiced DA chick when you need them? They would have never let this happen. 

But despite the rage and the endless whys, this show was amazing. And for once, I was able to partake in conversation using the current lexicon that had entered pop culture. Usually, from the moment I hear people raving about something, I immediately become disgusted and avoid it. I still haven't watched Breaking Bad, Walking Dead, or Game of Thrones. See mom, I did listen. If everyone else is jumping off the bridge, I don't just do it too. But in this case, I discovered this show that silently entered the world digitally, without any prior hype, while alone on my couch. Netflix suggested it to me, and since I am a fan of a good mystery and was tired of watching sappy Christmas specials, I decided to give it a whirl. And by the time, 10 hours or so later, when I came out of my viewing hovel on the couch, it seemed everyone else had simultaneously discovered it and seen it too.
And everyone was fascinated and outraged. They blogged, and posted, and tweeted, and obsessed over this.  They even did something relatively productive. They created an online petition to the White House to pardon Avery and his nephew that has already acquired the 100,000 signatures needed to ensure that the White House must now respond. So the story isn't over. Thank goodness, Netflix could get a second season out of this.

So if you haven't watched this show, get on it. Call out sick immediately and just settle in and go for it. It's like a band-aid, best to rip it all off at once. There is no way to train for this kind of marathon.

And if you have already watched it, try to keep calm and avoid giving in to the conspiracy theory life. This show is a dangerous gateway drug that will lead you down the acid trip rabbit hole where Tupac is alive and Paul is dead and the government is trying to control your mind and poison you. 

Just be grateful for the wonderful holiday memories you shared with Netflix this year. Wasn't it a nice change of pace to spend that week between Christmas and New Years filled with rage from something other than family out-staying their welcome?

Here's to a 2016 filled with things that unite and excite us as much as "Making a Murderer!"