Wednesday, May 15, 2013

A Short Honeymoon

Picture this:
You are a just married blushing bride on the tropical honeymoon of your dreams. After a wonderful day of fun in the sun, you and your new husband curl up in bed.
In the middle of the night, you wake up, cold and alone, and are filled with terror as you realize that your love has disappeared. In a panic with your imagination running wild from all those tales of horror and kidnap in the tropics you heard on 60 Minutes, you call the cops to report him missing. But what the cops tell you is arguably worse. Your husband isn't missing-he's busted.
This nightmare actually happened to a poor young bride this week whose turd of a husband left their honeymoon sweet at their luxury resort to pursue an ad on backpage.com for sex with a prostitute and unfortunately for him, that "hooker" was an undercover cop and he ended up getting arrested as part of the County Sheriff Office's major sting. Yikes. I've heard about honeymoons from hell where bad weather, lost luggage, food poisoning, rashes, run ins with exes, and all sorts of other things get in the way of the anticipated sexy fun, but the groom getting arrested for seeking sex with a prostitute really takes the wedding cake for the worst honeymoon ever. I need a huge cocktail to cope from just thinking about this story.
So.......yeah. Single isn't so bad. I'd rather be single than a bride bailing my cheating groom out of jail.

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